Child Abuse Recovery Journal

The new home of Suite101's Child Abuse & Recovery Feature Writer, Susan Maree Jeavons. Susan is a child abuse survivor who provides articles, commentary, poetry, support, and information on topics related to child abuse.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

C.A.R.E.-Child Abuse Robs Everyone

An Idealist’s View
© 2006 Susan Maree Jeavons-All Rights Reserved

Lately, I have pondered on what child abuse really does. Not only does it scar the victim, but it scars society. We can see its endless trail of destruction everywhere we look.

A child who has been abused may grow up having a different impression of life than someone who grew up in a loving home. They may be hypersensitive and/or view others with suspicion and caution. They may feel anger, resentment and even rage towards a society that has failed to protect them. They may withdraw from society because of fear and depression. Or, they may fight back by harming themselves and others.

Our jails and prisons are filled with the human wreckage of child abuse. Many of these criminals were abused as children. Many grew up to become abusers in one way or another, raping, robbing and wreaking havoc in our communities. Some turn to prostitution or drugs. Still, the full scope of the complications of child abuse are somewhat immeasurable. Its poison has seeped into every corner of society. Yet instead of trying to find solutions to this canker that destroys the spirit of our youth, society has become hyper-violent. In fact, we glamorize violence!

Today’s young people view more violence on TV, the Internet, their games, and even in their schools, than any generation before them. Violent youth gangs have infected almost every town in America. Young people are told that gangs are cool, and are encouraged to join. Many join because they want to feel like they belong, or because they need to be valued for something, even if that something is violence.

Children who have been, or are being abused, may see all this as proof that no one really cares enough to do something to end the violence. But change is needed now! We must care enough to voice our opposition to violence in the media and our communities. We must care enough to teach our children that violence is wrong. We must care enough to turn off the TV, take away the violent games, and take back our cities and towns. We must care enough to stop spoiling our children and start teaching them that they have to work for what they want. We must care enough to stop using our hands to harm, and instead, start extending our hands to help those who need help.

Teaching children the difference between right and wrong may be a basic lesson, yet we have failed to do so adequately. Parenting classes should be mandatory for all high school students. So should relaxation therapy, religious and racial tolerance classes, and self-control classes. Giving our children the education to succeed not only financially in life, but personally and spiritually, will hopefully lead to a society that values its children and life itself, more.
Love means caring enough to not only speak out, but to reach out and hold on, and never give up hope or the belief, that all children deserve to live in a violence free world. Care enough , and it may even lead to world peace someday…

11 Comments:

  • At 12:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    You've an interesting blog!
    Link-exchange with www.magnusbeckerblog.de (against sexual violence), please! Thank u!

     
  • At 2:17 PM, Blogger Susan Maree Jeavons said…

    I'm sorry, I only link to sites in English. That way, I am linking to sites that I can review before linking. Your's is in a foreign language, therefore I have no idea what is posted there. I hope you understand.

     
  • At 12:40 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I just found your blog, although I've been on your email mailing list for a number of years. I found your blog through the latest issue of your newsletter. Thank you for having such an honest and uplifting blog.

    If it weren't for intervention from my employer, I may have just continued with my fear of other people, which was a continuation of the fear and panic I experienced from child abuse. As you say in your post, we need to provide healthier resources for our children today. Too many are growing up with little sense of moral values. And I'm not just talking about religious values. I'm thinking of what you wrote about, a basic sense of right and wrong. Too many children are abandoned by their parents who are too busy making money to do what they think is right for their children, provide them with "stuff."

    I've had the joy recently of getting my book of recovery poems selling on amazon.com. I hope my story of recovery from child abuse can help others.

     
  • At 5:21 PM, Blogger Susan Maree Jeavons said…

    Al, thank you for your kind words. Please feel free to post your recovery poetry here, any links to your book or web site.

     
  • At 8:48 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Falling Star
    Her name was Starlynne
    but her friends called her Star,
    her mother gave birth to her
    in an old, abandoned car.
    By the age of one
    she was sold for the perfect high,
    tossed into a dumpster
    and left there to die.
    She was found the following morning
    half frozen, barely alive,
    the doctors did their best to save her
    but she did not survive.
    She was found unclothed and soiled
    beaten, bound and burned,
    there was also evidence
    a rapist took his turn.
    The officer that found her couldn't forget
    the tired smile on her innocent face,
    when he removed her from the dumpster,
    that cold and rainy day.
    He held her tightly to his chest
    he placed her familiar face into his car,
    he burst into tears...her T-shirt read:
    "I'm your shining Star."
    she lies under manicured grass
    a polished rock bears her name,
    a dash signifies her tortured span
    this poem marks her fame.
    Next time you see a falling star
    descending without a sound,
    hold your eyes wide open
    catch it before it hits the ground.

    All rights reserved Dayna Baker
    March 7, 2006
    whitesparrow57@netzero.com

     
  • At 12:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Dayna, your poem is so sad. But thank you for sharing it. We need to hear it. And I do appreciate the ending.

     
  • At 2:26 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Coolio site dudes.
    I be lovin it B.
    Cool man

    Addiction and Drug Abuse in Canada
    http://health-network.servehttp.com/health/

    Regards,
    Gerald E.
    http://health-network.servehttp.com/health/
    Addiction and Drug Abuse in Canada

     
  • At 10:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Susan I hope that you're well. I'm happy to see youblogging on this topic. I've always admired you for the stand you take on child abuse. One lucky winner will be winning a copy of your heartful poetry book this week so I thought I stop in and say hi.

     
  • At 8:25 AM, Blogger Tery Lynne said…

    A lot of people are still coming to this blog. I hope you come by soon and pick up where you left off. You do great work and would love to see you up and writing again.

     
  • At 5:56 AM, Blogger Susan Maree Jeavons said…

    Thanks for stopping by Rose and Beachwriter. I apologize for not replying sooner.

    I have not been spending much time online. I seem to have a nasty case of writer's block, or maybe just a lack of inspiration lately. I know that I will recover, but until then I have been spending time outside working in my flower gardens and listening to the chorus of birds that fill my feeders. The Finches, Wrens, Orioles and Woodpeckers keep me entertained for hours. With the hotter days looming, I won't be able to sit outside much longer, as my asthma keeps me indoors.

    I am trying to continue to write articles on the topic of child abuse, but I think I need this time out to consider what my true purpose is. When I was at Suite101, I enjoyed writing articles and receiving commentary on them. I would hear from many survivors who would email me wanting someone to just listen to their stories. I did that for almost 7 years. They also gave me encouragement and a reason to keep writing. Now that I am no longer at Suite101, the emails have almost stopped. But I won't. I just need to take this break. So if you don't hear from me, don't worry. I am still here. Just taking a breather.

    Hugs and Blessings,
    Susan Maree

     
  • At 2:16 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    It still baffles me how many people have gone through the same thing. I have been trying to deal with all the issues that come along with child abuse since I was 9. I am currently 21. I look forward to your posts!

     

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